It's Been a Long Spring

It's been a long time since I've written a post or worked on #HeyYouGuys. Spring was sort of terrible.

We moved from Tampa Bay to Sarasota, which doesn't seem like too far a trip... until you make 11 round trips for two weeks and rack up who knows how many SunPass charges (that haven't been tallied since they apparently felt like updating their system last month). I packed my tiny car full of boxes and clothes and belongings and drove back and forth, walked up and down 16 stairs (because of course, we had to get a second-floor condo), and suffered through who knows how much heat exhaustion, because obviously it's our bright idea to MOVE in the middle of SUMMER in FLORIDA.

So between the stress of packing and moving and lifting and straining, I finally felt like writing something last week.

And then...

 Maxwell and I in December 2004

Maxwell and I in December 2004

My poor puppy, Maxwell Silverhammer... My little boy... My rescue buddy passed away on Monday, July 2nd. He had been with my family since Thanksgiving Eve in 2004 when he was found at the RPI campus. I wrapped him up in a blanket (the same way that night I brought him home so many years ago) after he refused to eat for two days, and we carried him off to the vet. It's one of the hardest things I've ever done but my parents and I sat on the floor with him as the vet injected him with the lethal cocktail.

My poor buddy.

My heart is so heavy, even now. 

Depression is this funny thing that slowly creeps in, even when you think you're doing fine, and just rips your life apart.

And unfortunately, I let it get the best of me. I started "stress-smoking" again and you can't believe how much I hate it. Every inhale I audibly say "yuck" because of how gross the entire thing is.

I have an appointment to meet my new personal trainer next week and I hope she can beat this out of me.

The interesting news is that I'm debating going back to school for my Bachelor's degree. I've put it off for so many years, and the idea of student loan debt makes me sick to my stomach, but it might be time to finish the damn program already.

I'm hoping that life in Sarasota will begin to settle down a little bit, but like most places, it's constantly "go go go."

In other news, I'm raising money for the St Petersburg Out of the Darkness Walk again this year. If you'd like to help me out in my fundraising efforts, please donate here.

Jacob

"Some people have bad days. Okay, no. Everyone has bad days. This was mine."

Sometimes I'm asked to review big-budget blockbusters for this site. And other times, I'm asked to review a film shot in my hometown, about an experience a friend of mine went through.

After finding his older brother's lifeless body, the suicide prompts cathartic changes in a young man. A true story about discovering the importance of humor amongst life's darkest moments.

Jacob was written and produced by Bobby Chase, of Next Evolution Media Production, and it tells the story of the day that Bobby found the body of his brother, Jacob.

During the 911 call, Bobby says: "Yeah uh, hey, I've never done this before but I think my brother is dead... I don't know, he's just hanging there, what do you want me to do?"

Shock can be amusing to an onlooker and cathartic to those who go through the situation. I cannot begin to imagine the level of catharsis that this film has given Bobby. 

The most telling points of this short film are the silence; when the background track stops for a moment and you just sit and wait to see what will happen next. You sort of know what's coming but you still hope for the best for Jake.

The issue I have with this short film is the fact that it is a short film. The short film is so well produced. I know the story has a lot more gaskets and wheels spinning in the background and I honestly hope that Bobby decides to (if he hasn't already) make this a feature film.

"Life is hard, and without a sense of humor, it will swallow you whole."

As someone who has had a long battle with depression, I appreciated this film. I cried the first time I watched it. It's hard for people who have lost family and friends to suicide understand where they should go and what they should do next.

Bobby has done everything he can to make the world a funnier place. He started the Feel Good Challenge in 2014 to help raise money and awareness for Suicide Prevention.

This film was a shocked look at the aftermath of a suicide. It's not romantic, it's honest. I am looking forward to possibly hosting a viewing of Jacob in the Tampa Bay area in the future.

#HeyYouGuys S1:E12: #TakeoverThursday with Zoom and Live a Great Story

#HeyYouGuys S1:E12: #TakeoverThursday with Zoom and Live a Great Story

Today is the twelfth episode of #HeyYouGuys, the video series where you guys watch me talk to some of the amazing people that are in my life. You'll learn something new, you'll hear some good music, and you'll laugh. Sit back, and shut up!

Meet  Zach "Zoom" Horvath, who started Live a Great Storyto inspire and connect people across the globe. Hear what he has to say about the group!

#HeyYouGuys S1:E11: #WomenCrushWednesday Interview with Becca Demmons Johnson of Refined Relics Designs

#HeyYouGuys S1:E11: #WomenCrushWednesday Interview with Becca Demmons Johnson of Refined Relics Designs

Today is the eleventh episode of #HeyYouGuys, a video series where I interview awesome people, act a food for a laugh, and drop some helpful knowledge on you. Becca Demmons Johnson, from Refined Relics, is an interior designer, mom, DVT survivor and my BFF.

#HeyYouGuys S1:E10: #TheatricalTuesday The Good Place and #LawyerWifePrank

#HeyYouGuys S1:E10: #TheatricalTuesday The Good Place and #LawyerWifePrank

Today is the tenth episode of #HeyYouGuys, a video series where I interview awesome people, act a food for a laugh, and drop some helpful knowledge on you.

#TheatricalTuesday is normally a day where I talk about a movie. However, DID YOU SEE WHAT MY WIFE DID TO MY PHONE? Thanks, NBC's The Good Place! Thanks A LOT!

#HeyYouGuys S1:E8: #FFS Friday Funnies

#HeyYouGuys S1:E8: #FFS Friday Funnies

Today is the eighth episode of #HeyYouGuys, a video series where I act a fool in order to make you all laugh. Hopefully, I will succeed, hopefully. Let me know in the comments!

#FFS is Friday Funnies with Samantha Ponzillo, a comedy series that will be released every Friday afternoon. Each week, join Samantha for a stand-up routine or a compilation of different funny videos.

This week, I subjected myself to an Ulta SNP Animal Mask

#HeyYouGuys S1:E7: #TakeoverThursday with Famous Ashley Grant!

#HeyYouGuys S1:E7: #TakeoverThursday with Famous Ashley Grant!

Today is the seventh episode of #HeyYouGuys, the video series where you guys watch me talk to some of the amazing people that are in my life. You'll learn something new, you'll hear some good music, and you'll laugh. Sit back, and shut up!

Meet the Famous Ashley Grant; ghostwriter, freelancer, and all around hilarious human being.

#HeyYouGuys S1:E6: #WomenCrushWednesday Interview with Bethany "B-Train" Semeiks

#HeyYouGuys S1:E6: #WomenCrushWednesday Interview with Bethany "B-Train" Semeiks

Today is the sixth episode of #HeyYouGuys, a video series where I interview awesome people, act a food for a laugh, and drop some helpful knowledge on you. Bethany "B-Train" Semeiks is so many things, it's hard to give her a summary. Roller derby, Arbonne, Crossfit Chalk, Wicked Skatewear... she's done it all!

#HeyYouGuys S1:E5: #TheatricalTuesday Annihilation

#HeyYouGuys S1:E5: #TheatricalTuesday Annihilation

Today is the fifth episode of #HeyYouGuys, a video series where I interview awesome people, act a food for a laugh, and drop some helpful knowledge on you.

#TheatricalTuesday is the day where I just cannot contain my level of excitement for some of the amazing films I've seen lately. Today, I focus on Annihilation.

How I Learned to Love Movies Again

How I Learned to Love Movies Again

A frank and open reason as to how I stopped seeing movies as the numbers associated with their profits, and the art that they were intended to be portrayed as. This also explains my recent boredom with superhero franchise films.

#HeyYouGuys S1:E4: #MM Motivation Monday

#HeyYouGuys S1:E4: #MM Motivation Monday

Today is the fourth episode of #HeyYouGuys, a video series where I interview awesome people, act a food for a laugh, and drop some helpful knowledge on you.

#MondayMotivation posts usually piss me off. But this time, I just couldn't keep my mouth shut because I am so sick of excuses. I'm totally sick of excuses people make to blow one another off, however, I'm SUPER pissed off at the excuses people make to prevent themselves from doing something new.

#HeyYouGuys S1:E3: #FFS Friday Funnies with Samantha Ponzillo

#HeyYouGuys S1:E3: #FFS Friday Funnies with Samantha Ponzillo

Today is the third episode of #HeyYouGuys, a video series where I act a fool in order to make you all laugh. Hopefully, I will succeed, hopefully. Let me know in the comments!

#FFS is Friday Funnies with Samantha Ponzillo, a comedy series that will be released every Friday afternoon. Each week, join Samantha for a stand-up routine or a compilation of different funny videos.